Rant Session

    Just to warn you this is a rant session.   There have been somethings that I've been hearing lately that have really been bothering me.  So I am hoping to write about it, get it off my chest and move on.

     First there is a mother I know who is having her second baby in a couple of weeks.  She stated that she feels nothing towards this baby and isn't even looking forward to it being here!  When I read this I thought how horrible and tried to not think of it again.  But then at least a dozen other mothers sympathized with her and felt the same way!!  One even stated that she is due next month and hasn't done the nursery yet and doesn't want to do it.  What is wrong with these women?  I swear women who get pregnant easily have no idea what a blessing it is to have a baby and honestly I don't understand why they are having a second child when they feel this way.

     Next I joined a facebook group that was suppose to be a support group for people with infertility issues. When I first joined it was so positive and I enjoyed reading comments and seeing were everyone was.  People also asked how I was doing and offered advise when I needed it.  Lately it has turned so negative.  It seems like everyone is complaining and feeling sorry for themselves and each other.  I miss how it use to be.

     Lastly I came across a blog of a woman I knew who was struggling to get through a devastating time in her life.  A group of women rallied around her and we did a meal train for her and even put together a craft fair to help support her and her family.  At first I was so proud to be apart of this group and thought what wonderful things we could to for other people in there time of need.  As time went on I slowly realized that these women aren't about helping others they are about feeling like they are better than others.  This group started because of one family's grief and I really hope they can get there act together and become the group they should be.

     Okay I got everything out.  Now it's time to move forward and not dwell on this negativity any longer.

A Beauty Contest

     We had our follow up with our RE yesterday to discuss doing a FET since our IVF cycle failed.  We only have one frozen embryo so I am a little worried about that.  I did find out some interesting facts though.  Like   my frozen embryo has a 90% chance of surviving the thaw process and then a 50% chance of resulting in a pregnancy.  Not really sure how I feel about this.  A 50% chance doesn't feel so great to me.  Something else he told me that I found interesting was how they grade the embryos.  It is basically a beauty contest.  They only go by how the embryo looks which means that a perfect looking embryo could have chromosomal problems and not implant and an embryo that looks horrible could be discarded and in actuality it could have been a perfect embryo.  This kind of upsets me because most of my embryos get discarded because of their "quality".  At this point all I can do is what for AF to arrive so we can start this next cycle and hope that this little embryo is healthy and strong.

BFN :*(

     I got the confirmation that I m not pregnant.  It's so hard to understand how a perfectly good embryo can be put directly into my uterus and I still don't get pregnant.  I have one frozen embryo from this cycle and met with the RE next Thursday to get the "new plan".  I'm hoping that this is God's plan.  He knows I only want one more child and I could never bare to keep that one frozen embryo frozen forever.  So I will still have hope.